One of the best things about being a life coach is that you get to talk to all kinds of people. And having coached thousands of young people online, I can say for a fact that success and failure have patterns.
There are exact ways to differentiate winners from losers. You will know them by how they think, talk, and behave. Losers are more likely to have these four things in common.
1. THEY GLORIFY HARD WORK.
I have said it before, Hard work is for losers. Winners don't care about work, they do whatever they do for fun. It is only losers that glorify hard work. If it takes hard work, brick layers and well diggers are going to be super rich.
Losers think in clusters. They feel life is about their strength and energy. Don't get me wrong. The glory of the youth is in his strength. But as a young person, your strength is not just your physical muscles alone. Your strength includes your mental energy. Your ability to think in systems and leverages. That's how to win. But most times, the discipline to build that mental energy is what losers run from.
Discipline is different from hard work. It takes discipline and consistency to build mental strength. But people confuse the purpose of discipline with hard work. Everybody can work hard, but not everybody can be disciplined. And remember, winning is not about doing your best, it's about doing what is required and doing it better than everyone else.
Developing a disciplined habit is what will help you be better than others. Successful people don't consider habit as hard work because it's part of who they are.
As James Clear will put it, "We do not rise to the level of our goals, we fall to the levels of our systems." So does every winner out there. You win by building systems, and it stems from being disciplined and committed to the course.
2. THEY DON'T QUIT.
I know you've often heard the phrase "Winners don't quit." Well, That's not true. Winners quit often, they only know when not to quit. It is even Losers who don't quit. They don't quit bad habits, bad friends, horrible jobs, and bad relationships. But they easily quit on their dreams.
And that is the problem a lot of people have. You cannot continue with the same pattern of living and expect a different result. Life doesn't work that way. If you continue to do everything comfortably, you will never get to anywhere that's profitable in life.
Change is the only constant thing in life and wisdom demands that when something isn't working for you, you change it. Give up on the things that are holding you back and embrace the responsibilities and demands of success. Pursue your dreams and make it a reality.
3. THEY VALUE THEIR EMOTIONS.
Winners don't care about their feelings, they focus on the results and they get the job done. The poor and the losers always care about their mental health, the abuse from their boss, and every emotion that flows through their body.
Being emotional is not a sin. How else are we to know that you're human? Black do tank and even the strongest sometimes, feel weak. It's natural. We cannot separate ourselves from our emotions. Successful people still feel pain, joy fear, happiness, love, and sadness. But despite all these, they still push on.
In the game of life, your emotion is not an excuse for failure. Your purpose and destiny are bigger than any atom of emotion you feel. Being happy or sad shouldn't be the reason for quitting your dreams.
Life is not taking it easy on anybody. Both Winners and losers go through some levels of struggles in life.
By this time last year, I was in police custody for 28 days over a case involving the exchange of dollars. Nobody who has been handled by the Nigeria Police will wish their worst enemy to face a similar fate.
But while I was in their custody, I was still paying my staff salaries. My business was still going on properly, and even after I got out, business went on as usual.
No matter what I had to go through it didn't distract me and my team from serving our customers and making sure business was going fine. I'm sharing this story with you to let you know that you're not alone in the struggle, and we all have our fair share of struggles.
WHAT ABOUT FEAR?
Fear is the most dangerous emotion out there. Fear is one of the reasons for massive failures in our world today. But the truth is, everybody has some atom of fear in their lives. I have my fears, you have yours too. Should fear be enough reason to give up on your dreams?
Author Helen Keller said it beautifully, she said: "Life is either a daring adventure or nothing at all..."
If you're not a little bit afraid at least 3 or 4 nights a week, you're not trying enough. Successful people live on the outside edge of what they're capable of. They push their selves beyond unimaginable boundaries despite their fears and struggles. And that's how they get unimaginable results.
The fear of failure is the greatest reason for failure in the adult life.
General Douglas McCarthy once said," There is no security in life only opportunity." The more we seek security the less we have it, the more we seek opportunity the more we have security. Let your fears put you on the edge. Let it be the reason you want to keep fighting and win in this game called life.
4. THEY ARE THE VICTIMS OF EVERY STORY.
Losers are the victims of every story even in their own stories. They are the victims of their parent, their job, their relationship, and the spiders in their wardrobes.
Losers are masters at playing the blame game. They give the power and control of their lives to someone or something else. They allow their Family, Friends, relationships, and every other unforeseen circumstance to dictate the outcome of their lives.
They all have clever reasons and excuses for failing and for why things are not going great in their lives. When bad things happen, they blame their friends, family, relations, the government, money, weather, economy, etc and never themselves.
We are all the main characters of our stories and our excuses are valid reasons for bad results. Understanding your role as the main character of your story gives you a sense of responsibility for your life. It enables you to take proper steps and actions that will produce better outcomes for your life. Your destiny is in your hands, you become what you choose.
Winners take responsibility. They own up to their shit and they refuse to let other people write their own stories for them.
Finally, winners don't flock together with failures. They move together with other winners like themselves.
If you want to stop being a loser, subscribe to my YouTube channel. And if you want to join my community of winners, click here.
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